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Relationship difficulties - Abusive

Domestic abuse includes any incident of threatening behaviour, violence or abuse. The abuse can be psychological, physical, social, financial, or emotional.

Domestic abuse can happen between two people who are or were intimate partners or family members, regardless of their gender or sexuality.

If you are in fear of a partner, ex-partner or member of your family, you might be experiencing domestic abuse.

If the answer to some of these questions is yes you might be experiencing domestic abuse. Do they often… 

  • Call you names and make you feel bad about yourself? 
  • Make you afraid by threatening you or your children? 
  • Behave violently towards you? 
  • Stop you seeing your friends or family? 
  • Keep you without money? 
  • Harm you or make you feel you could be seriously harmed?

Get help now

New Era provides free and confidential round-the-clock advice and support for anyone in Staffordshire and Stoke-on-Trent affected by domestic abuse - regardless of their age, ethnicity, gender or location.

  • The 24-hour confidential helpline for victims is: 0300 303 3778 and there’s a live chat facility via www.new-era.uk  
  • The confidential helpline for perpetrators is: 01785 601690.

New Era is co-funded by the Staffordshire Commissioner, Staffordshire County Council and Stoke-on-Trent City Council. The service - for victims, perpetrators, as well as their families - is delivered by Victim Support and Reducing Reoffending Partnership (RRP) through a team of specialist advisors, focusing on prevention and early intervention.  

Other Services

Women experiencing domestic abuse National Domestic Violence Helpline 0808 2000 247 https://www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/

Women's Aid web-based chat: live chat times Mon-Fri, 10am-12pm  https://chat.womensaid.org.uk/ email: helpline@womensaid.org.uk website: https://www.womensaid.org.uk/

Men experiencing domestic abuse Men's Advice Line 0808 801 0327 https://mensadviceline.org.uk/

Lesbians, gay men, bisexuals and trans people National LGBT Domestic Violence Helpline 0800 999 5428 http://www.galop.org.uk/ email: help@galop.org.uk

Victim Support National Support Line 0808 168 9111 plus 24/7 web chat service https://www.victimsupport.org.uk/

Honour-based abuse Karma Nirvana: supporting victims of honour-based abuse and forced marriage 0800 599 9247 https://karmanirvana.org.uk/ support@karmanirvana.org.uk

Samaritans Emotional support and people to listen 08457 90 90 90

Police Is your personal safety threatened? Or are you at risk of injury or assault? Or is it an emergency? If the situation is critical, call 999 and ask for the police.  If someone is in danger and unable to talk on the phone, they can press 55 to get to the relevant police force (known as the Silent Solution system).

Leaving home immediately

If you feel you are at risk of harm there are alternatives you could explore such as a Sanctuary Scheme which can carry out safety works in your home such as changing locks, fire proof letter boxes and panic rooms. You can access this free service by calling the Pathway Project on 01543 676800 (24 hours) – www.pathway-project.co.uk.

If however you think you need leave your home, try to arrange temporary housing from the council before you leave. Not everyone leaving home due to violence is entitled to emergency accommodation. You could stay with friends or relatives while you think about what to do next.

If you're a woman leaving domestic abuse, try to find a place in a women's refuge. The Pathway Project can help you with this. Take some essentials with you such as a change of clothes, toiletries and any medication you need to take regularly. Try to bring important items such as your passport, bank and credit cards and mobile phone. Don't make a decision to give up your home permanently until you have spoken to an advisor and considered all your options.

Get homelessness help from the council

You can apply to our Housing Options Team as a homeless person if you can't stay in your home. The council has to give you advice about finding somewhere to live. Some people are entitled to emergency accommodation. If the council has a duty to find you somewhere to live you will be asked to provide details of your situation. You may be asked for supporting evidence, which could include details and dates of incidents. You can take a friend or an adviser with you for support.

Get advice immediately if the council says it won't help you because it believes it was reasonable for you to stay in your home. You could challenge its decision.

Find out about Legal Aid Services

Civil Legal Advice www.gov.uk/civil-legal-advice - 0345 345 4 345

Help from social services

Some people may be entitled to help from the council's social services department. Social services might be able to help if you:

  • are elderly
  • have children living with you
  • are under the age of 18
  • have left care (or are about to do so)
  • are in poor health
  • have a physical or learning disability

Social services may be able to help by finding accommodation for you, paying for a deposit or providing financial support. There are no rules about the kind of help social services have to provide.

Refuges for women

Women experiencing domestic abuse may be able to stay in a women's refuge. Some refuges are specifically for women from certain backgrounds, such as Irish or Asian women. Staff at refuges can give you advice about your situation. For more information about refuges please contact:-

Refuges for men

If you are man who has to leave home because of domestic abuse, you can make a homeless application to the council. There is limited specialist housing for men experiencing domestic abuse.

  • 4 Men 01543 676800

Help for children and young people If you or someone else in your family is being hurt at home, you may not be sure what you can do about it. Domestic abuse is not your fault and you won't get into trouble for telling someone about it. The first thing is to tell someone else about what is happening to you. You can tell a teacher, a neighbour, a friend or a friend's parent. You can call:

Childline (free phone – no call charges) 0800 1111

They won't tell anyone else you are calling unless you are in immediate danger. They can tell you about places where you can get help. Find out more about what you can do from The Hideout thehideout.org.uk. It’s a website that covers a lot for children and young people and domestic abuse and violence.

Phone App

Bright Sky is a free mobile application (available from App Store and Google Play Store) providing information and support in relation to domestic abuse whether it is yourself that is experiencing it or someone you are worried about.